he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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