dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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