The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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