I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
