just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
this hospital has no fireball
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
