hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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