Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
