i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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