If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
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