Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?

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  (616): dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us? http://tfl.nu/bgpp
  Replies (8) Good night (1544) Bad night (630)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.

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  (917): Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard. http://tfl.nu/xsvt
  Replies (23) Good night (2956) Bad night (901)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.

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  (408): So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed. http://tfl.nu/urd8
  Replies (13) Good night (733) Bad night (5899)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling

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  (208): opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling http://tfl.nu/a6db
  Replies (11) Good night (6321) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.

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  (760): It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica. http://tfl.nu/vdor
  Replies (23) Good night (1199) Bad night (3940)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.

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  (678): I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom. http://tfl.nu/95nr
  Replies (18) Good night (2253) Bad night (4188)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying

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  (404): He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying http://tfl.nu/0ccm
  Replies (8) Good night (3448) Bad night (4216)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.

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  (914): I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired. http://tfl.nu/rh17
  Replies (11) Good night (1051) Bad night (2832)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.

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  (717): Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated. http://tfl.nu/4rw5
  Replies (7) Good night (1013) Bad night (1947)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order

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  (503): There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order http://tfl.nu/v9bj
  Replies (3) Good night (870) Bad night (1809)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.

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  (480): It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood. http://tfl.nu/ktz5
  Replies (4) Good night (2051) Bad night (677)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers

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  (+61): Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers http://tfl.nu/a2tk
  Replies (7) Good night (1215) Bad night (514)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good

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  (508): Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good http://tfl.nu/obpt
  Replies (10) Good night (963) Bad night (488)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom

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  (610): Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom http://tfl.nu/xyyz
  Replies (3) Good night (775) Bad night (506)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Thats alot of pressure.

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.

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  (813): Thats alot of pressure. (1-813): Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house. http://tfl.nu/tdoy
  Replies (2) Good night (726) Bad night (416)

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