Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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