White coat. Heels.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
