WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
