everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I want her autograph on my taint
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
