there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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