what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
