so that wasnt chicken after all
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize