I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Randomize
