thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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