Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
