Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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