Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize