What a fucking waste of an outfit
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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