awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize