i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
