My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
You're a waste of cheezeits
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
