I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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