i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
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