now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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