Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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