dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
