just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
