you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
