About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Randomize