Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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