Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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