Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
