you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize