I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I am available for nakedness
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
