never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
