i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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