i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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