I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
