3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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