So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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