I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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