Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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