Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Randomize