my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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