there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
