i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
The air taste purple.
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